Here's an understatement for you: we live in a world of distractions. In every facet of life we are bombarded. As I sit here typing, for example, I'm getting 'new e-mail' alerts, my assistant is instant messaging me, my kids and dog want to play, I'm thirsty, the phone is ringing. . . you get the point. Just writing one paragraph can be exhausting when there are so many things dividing ones attention.

There's an old saying that goes, 'If you chase two rabbits, both will escape.' As we become increasingly fragmented and scatter our energy, we are not giving adequate attention to the important task at hand.

Alexander Graham Bell said, 'Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus.'

There are so many things we can and may be thinking about when we are interacting with a prospect or client. Our internal dialogs may have us worried about our breath or maybe we've got something stuck in our teeth. We might be worried about what the mechanic is going to tell us when we call them back or if the kids got to school on time. Issues large and small will battle for our attention and really what we need to be doing is focusing on our prospects and moreover, focusing intently on our prospects criteria and values.

I think of this focus as a flashlight. For example, if we aim our flashlight at a wall out in front of us, we might think we're seeing quite a bit. But say there's something on a shelf that you really want to see. . . what do you do? Well, if you have a flashlight like mine, you have the ability to make the beam wider or narrower. When it gets narrower, it penetrates further. And when it's wider, it shows me more space, but less distance. By beginning to focus laser-like on one aspect, we can see more clearly what we want to see (in this case, what we want to know is what our clients want).

I like to imagine that the client is a white board, I've wiped clean, wiped myself clean, and now they're writing themselves onto that board of which I'm becoming a part of. If we can focus on identity as persuaders, this would be a key area for which we can develop parts, a key area that we can frame and reframe. It's a very powerful area.

The whole point to persuasion is being able to, with agility and flexibility, shine the our lights in a variety of ways so that we can best understand and provide what our affluent prospects and customers require. Next time you're interacting with someone, really interact, concentrate, focus, and remain open to what they are saying and shut out all other distractions.

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Kenrick Cleveland teaches strategies to earn the business of affluent prospects using persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in persuasion strategies.