We often find ourselves amid the wreckage of a love gone wrong, wringing our hands and asking, "Why did he or she turn out to be such a jerk?" I'm sure that person made many of the 7 Dumbest Relationship Mistakes, but what you should be asking yourself is, "Which mistakes did I make and how could I have prevented this?"
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It's all about marketing yourself (truthfully) if you want to get online dating results. It's a concept we learned in Kindergarten. Do you remember "Show and Tell?" The anticipation and excitement you felt when you were five years old and it was your turn to show your favorite possession and then tell about it.
It was your job to convince the other children in the class about the wonderful attributes of your item in order to win them over. The same techniques you used as a child can be done with more sophistication now. You are trying to sell yourself and win people over to your team. When you join an online dating service, you have much the same feeling of anticipation and excitement as you did when you were a child. The prospect of having people approve of you and possibly accept you as someone they want to have around them is exhilarating. But how do you create a powerful and perfect online dating profile? We have all heard that honesty is the best policy...it is. Be honest. The person you are trying to attract will eventually agree to meet you if you have written an eye-catching profile. Statistics show that people can only keep up a facade of playing someone other than themselves for 3-6 months. Do you want to find Mr./Mrs. Right only to lose him/her because you have become Mr./Mrs. Wrong to them? Adhere to the honesty policy. Be clever and funny, but be sincere. If you're funny, then show it in your writing. Don't tell someone you're funny, e.g. "I'm funny and have a great sense of humor." That won't make them a believer. Here is an example of something funny and clever. Football fans will enjoy this one. (This is not for your profile, but used as an example of funny lines I have used when talking to an audience.): "If your partner is more concerned about that 3rd and 1 on television, than the 4th and 23 in your own living room, then you might be another statistic on the playing field of love. Tell them to not try for a 58 yard field goal, go for six instead." Do you see what I'm writing about? Word pictures are very powerful tools that help draw the reader in and help to reveal who you are and what you are about. Another important aspect of your online dating profile is you. Show them a picture of you. A picture speaks volumes (as long as the listener is tuned in) about who you are. If you say you are sporty but have a picture of you sitting on a couch, what does that say? Use a picture of you on a bike, in a race, water-skiing, etc. The eyes reveal a lot in a picture. If they sparkle with what's called a "catch light," the viewer will be more drawn to you. (A catch light is the little light that shows up on the pupil). If your eyes look suave, the viewer will probably click you away. Make sure to do a spelling and grammar check before you post to an online dating site. Words that are spelled incorrectly and bad punctuation can tune a lot of people out and then they will click you off. A few last words of advice: Forget about negativity in your profile and don't talk about ex-relationships. That will give the reader a sense that you are a serial dater and perhaps a heartbreaker. Avoid phrases like: "I don't play games." "I love long walks on the beach, candlelight dinners, and romantic nights by the fire." You can show them that when you meet them. Every person I have surveyed in the past has said that lines such as the above are red flags and a sign that he/she is a "player." Online dating can be fun, exciting and successful, but be safe and enjoy the process. When you finally connect with someone on an online dating site, agree to meet at a coffee shop during the day.
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